The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week (Aug. 1-7)
The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious musings of 280 characters or fewer.
Scroll through this week’s great tweets from women below. Then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.
No one:
Me alone in the kitchen: Okay guys so now I’m going to preheat my oven to 350— Gabby 🧚🏽♀️ (@bria_simone21) August 1, 2020
normalize barking back at dogs when they bark at you
— ena ²⁸ (@RAINBERRYROGUE) August 2, 2020
I love masks. I can’t believe I let y’all just breathe on me before.
— cristina arreola (@C_Arreola) August 5, 2020
Say yes to masks
And no to bras.
Free the titi
But protect the city— Lia_Lia🇯🇲 (@lord_lia) August 5, 2020
some girls belong to the streets but i belong to the ponds bc i’m a silly goose
— whit (@whitgailk) August 5, 2020
i just think if i chewed lava quick enough it wouldn’t be too bad
— shar (@sharloola) August 5, 2020
My ex keeps telling me I’m being “petty,” and it’s like, dude, spellcheck, it’s P-R-E-T-T-Y
— Ginny Hogan_ (@ginnyhogan_) August 6, 2020
the dentist just asked me to open up and now I can’t stop crying
— Mom Jeans (@momjeansplease) August 4, 2020
cant believe rihanna had 10 year old me singing about how chains and whips excite me
— em🎃 (@emxlyyyy_xo) August 5, 2020
you know, suddenly it makes a lot of sense now why so much YA dystopia only took place in America with no mention of what was happening with the rest of the world
they were all probably just chilling— chloe gong 🖤 (@thechloegong) August 2, 2020
Every friend group has a weatherman. If yours doesn’t, well, buddy — you’re the weatherman
— broti gupta (@BrotiGupta) August 1, 2020
Charcuterie is just what happens when you have a Depressed Meal and eat assorted things straight out of the fridge, but you're Business Depressed so you put it on a bit of wood.
— Natalie'Zorah (@TerraSirena) August 4, 2020