Bachelor Recap: Pageant Rivals Caelynn and Hannah B. Turn on Each Other, Leaving Colton Confused

Put down the mimosas because the gloves are officially coming off on this week’s episode of The Bachelor.

On Monday’s episode, Colton Underwood is faced with the harsh realities that come with dating multiple women at once and is forced to make some tough decisions that send some women into a complete panic. Here’s how it all went down.

FIRST GROUP DATE

Katie, Heather, Hannah B., Courtney, Kirpa, Tracy, Demi and Caelynn transform themselves into swash-buckling pirates for the first group date of the week. It’s never really explained what the purpose of the pirate-themed date is — besides getting to hear the women refer to Colton as “the captain” multiple times.

“The job of a pirate is to steal and I’m here to steal Colton’s heart. I don’t want to be another one of those yo-ho-hos,” says Demi, embracing the theme.

It does, however, become apparent that the real purpose of the date is to watch tensions between beauty pageant rivals Hannah B. and Caelynn simmer to an all-time high.

“It’s a little frustrating to watch Caelynn engage with Colton right in front of me,” says Hannah B. “I’m trying my hardest to not get upset but then Caelynn is just everywhere. I didn’t come here to compete in another pageant. Honestly, this sucks.”

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When Caelynn wins the pirate contest (again, what? Why?), Hannah B., nearly has a mental breakdown at the sight of Colton giving her a congratulatory kiss.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” she says. “It’s not easy to see Caelynn moving forward with Colton. It brings out all of my insecurities and I start to spiral. If Colton knew the truth about Caelynn I think he would feel differently about her.”

Things really come to a head when Hannah B. decides to confide in Colton about Caelynn’s true intentions (because trash-talking other women always works out so well on this show) during the cocktail portion of the date.

“I was just in a high-stress situation with her and it was like the most hostile environment I’ve ever been in,” she tells him. “It’s hard because it’s like, if that’s what you want, you don’t want me.”

The conversation does not go well, to say the least. Hannah B. struggles to articulately explain herself, leaving Colton extremely frustrated. Hannah B. has to literally ASK him for a kiss before he walks away.

Colton immediately goes to hear Caelynn’s side of the story. When she breaks down in tears saying she wasn’t planning to address her past tonight, Colton comforts her and gives her the group date rose.

“I want you to know that I like you a lot and it’s about our time together and our connection,” he says.

Sorry, Hannah B.

WATCH: The Bachelor’s Colton Underwood Says He’s ‘Undeniably Myself’ This Season

ONE ON ONE WITH ELYSE

Colton chooses Elyse for this week’s one-on-one. The two take a helicopter to San Diego for a private day at a carnival. But if Elyse thought the date was just between her and Colton, she was super wrong. Ten kids run out to join to the two — because nothing screams romance quite like babysitting!

Elyse takes the surprise in stride and seems to have a great time interacting with the children (am I the only one who feels weird about the 31-year-old being forced to prove she’d be a good mom? No? Okay.).

Things take a more serious turn when the two sit down for dinner, and they discuss whether their five-year age difference could hinder their relationship. It’s clear from the start that Colton actually finds Elyse’s confidence and sense of calm refreshing.

“I don’t think our lives have been necessarily similar to get us here, but I guess that doesn’t really matter,” she says.

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And after Elyse opens up about a painful experience from her past, Colton calls her “incredible.”

“Hearing you sort of with the glass half-full and hearing you talk about your family is really special,” Colton adds. “How strong you are as a person really shows.”

Needless to say, she gets the rose.

SECOND GROUP DATE

If you thought we were going to get through an entire episode without seeing Colton shirtless, you thought wrong, my friend. Tayshia, Nina, Catherine, Sydney, Onyeka, Cassie, Nicole, and Caitlin meet the man of the hour at a gym for a fitness-themed date.

Yay? Honestly, just send me home right there. But naturally, the women didn’t seem to mind that they’d be spending their day in a workout class because it meant they got to see Colton without his shirt.

“We pull up and Colton is waiting for us topless, which is a really nice sight,” says Caitlin.

Terry Crews and his wife Rebecca are on hand to help Colton put the women through a fitness competition in order to find his “strong woman.” Immediately, dancer Sydney, track-star Onyeka and karate kid Catherine prove to be the standouts.

(This just reminded me, has anyone seen Catherine’s dog? WHERE IS LUCY?!)

After Onyeka takes home the “Strongest Woman” trophy, everyone is feeling good heading into the cocktail portion of the night.

Caitlin especially is looking forward to her time with Colton, admitting that she isn’t as far along with him as some of the other women. “I feel like I’ve kind of been slipping behind a little bit because we got sent home on the last group date.”

RELATED VIDEO: Bachelor Colton Underwood Calls Aly Raisman His ‘First Love,’ Admits 2017 Split ‘Was Really Tough’

But when Colton asks her what she’s looking for in a relationship and Caitlin says she wants “somebody that’s happy to go out with me and my friends and have a really ridiculous, silly evening,” Colton’s eyes all but glass over. Caitlin struggles to find anything to “open up” about, admitting her life has been pretty easy thus far. “I haven’t had anything happen in my life that is standing out right now that I want to share with you.”

Unable to see a future, Colton sends her home before the night is over.

“If I’m being completely honest, tonight I just didn’t feel like that spark was there,” he says. “I’m sorry, you are somebody who deserves the best, but I just don’t think that you are for me.”

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POOL PARTY

In lieu of a cocktail party, Colton decides to spend some quality time with the women by the pool. The afternoon starts off great, with everyone laughing as they splash around in the pool and lounge on swan floats.

The women really seem to be at ease and enjoying their time — except for Hannah B., who is still spiraling after the other night. Things only get worse when she sees Colton walk off with Caelynn.

“If Caelynn is talking crap about me she better beware,” she says. “There is a beautiful monster inside of me and today I’m going to have to let it out. There’s a tank of rage and it is full. The beast is about to come out.”

Meanwhile, Caelynn tells Colton that Hannah B. is “manipulative”, “deceitful” and “toxic.”

When Colton goes and talks to Hannah B., she turns the blame back on her frenemy and says Caelynn is actually the liar. “She’s not showing all of who she is when she’s with you.”

At this point, Colton is fed up. “I feel like I’m going around and round in circles. I don’t know what to believe.”

“I’m frustrated because I still don’t understand this,” he tells a producer off-camera. “The last thing I wanted to do today was spend all day at the pool party talking about this. I’m not getting clarity at all.”

With one elimination already out of the way, Colton moves on to the rose ceremony feeling a little uneasy. But after some contemplation, he ultimately decides to give Hannah B. a rose and says goodbye to Bri, Catherine and Nina.

The Bachelor airs Mondays (8 p.m. ET) on ABC.