Rodger Cuzner’s Twas the week before Christmas: Liberal MP slams Tories with rhyme

Cape Breton-Canso MP Rodger Cuzner pays tribute to the late Raylene Rankin in the House of Commons on Monday.

Forget about Thomas Mulcair.

Never mind Elizabeth May.

I'll take rhyming Liberal Rodger Cuzner over any other MP in a Parliamentary showdown.

You may remember Cuzner from such parodies as the 'Bev Oda rap', 'The Ballad of Justin and Patrick' and last Christmas' 'Twas the week before Christmas (on Parliament Hill).'

Here's his latest holiday yarn:

Text of the poem: (courtesy of OpenParliament.ca:)

"Twas the week before Christmas and things were a mess;

The bulging new deficit had the P.M. under stress;

"These numbers are awful, I can't believe them myself;

"Nigel, I need some answers, go get me that elf";

But the Minister of Finance could not shed much light;

He told the Parliamentary Budget Officer to go fly a kite;

"These cabinet expenses, we have to cut them and grind them;

"Tell the minister from Labrador, if anyone can find him;

"We should be roasting chestnuts and decking the halls;

"But the opposition just wants to be busting our robocalls"

Things got even worse than bad meat that's infected;

Transport Canada layoffs left Santa's sleigh not inspected;

Christmas would be scuttled like the F-35 plan;

Three years of that BS got flushed down the can;

Santa needed a saviour, someone decked out in red;

A wily old veteran with white on his head;

He called in a favour, they inspected the sleigh;

The member for Toronto Centre just saved Christmas Day;

There were presents under trees and smiles on kids' faces;

He did a great job as Santa on an interim basis."