Redditor shares passive-aggressive childhood note to tooth fairy

Hell hath no fury like a 9-year-old scorned by the tooth fairy, and a letter written by a redditor in her youth and recently discovered by her father proves it.

Reddit user Judokitten, whose real name is Jennifer, posted the hilarious passive-aggressive note online:

“(Not very) Dear T.f.,” she began, “This is the second time you’ve done this. You forgot me. So if you’re not going to come, then, I’m going to keep my own teeth. You are through collecting teeth from Jennifer [name redacted]. From now on I’m keeping my own teeth.”

“Unsincerely, Jennifer E.”

“P.S. Keep collecting from Mike, though. Obviously you like him better.”

“P.P.S. Don’t bother to write back.”

The tooth fairy, however, did write back — and defended herself.

Jennifer shared more of the story in the comments:

“Full story. So, I had lost a tooth, but I was suspicious about the actual validity of the tooth fairy’s magical abilities. So, I didn’t tell anyone about the lost tooth. Lo and behold, she did not arrive,” she wrote.

“The next morning, I loudly proclaimed the tooth fairy bullshit in my 9 year old terms, and my mom told me to write her a letter expressing my displeasure.”

“I was returned a letter that basically said, ‘I couldn’t get to your pillow the night before last because I got stuck in all the mess. Maybe if you clean your room, I could get to you in a timely manner.’”

“Well played, tooth fairy. Well played.”