Have you heard the Louis C.K. bit about people who hate their phones? The comedian can't believe people aren't simply amazed by everything their phone can do. They're so inpatient. They want everything to happen immediately. Seconds feel like minutes. Minutes feel like days.
"Can you give it a second?" he asks.
"It's going to space. That's amazing! Can you just give it a second?"
Some people probably can. Some people don't need the newest and the fastest. For the rest of you, the folks who like — and, sometimes, need — the newest and the best, this list is for you.
We've compiled five of the best phones you can buy right now. It's impossible to say these are the best phones in the world. People are passionate about their phones and will argue the smallest detail to prove their choice is the best. But these are, to quote Mr. C.K., five of the most "amazing" phones you can buy right now.
1. HTC Droid DNA
HTC is calling this the Most Advanced Smartphone in the world. To be sure, it's a fantastic phone. The design is beautiful, and the quality and innovation packed inside makes it perhaps the greatest Droid ever made. It has a quad-core processor, Android 4.1 Jelly Bean, 4G LTE and a beautiful 5-inch screen. Apple is right to boast about their Retina Display, but this Verizon phone is no slouch with a 1080p HD display.
The DNA has a light and slim polycarbonate plastic body that feels good in your hand, evidence of its solid construction. It's not a cheap phone, and it doesn't feel like one.
Furthermore, the camera is excellent and the battery life is long. It may not be cheap, but you certainly get a hell of a phone for $199.
By all accounts this is the best iPhone ever made. Whatever you may have missed in the iPhone 4S is probably built into this one. It has 4G LTE, a screen that is larger and longer, and a faster processor.
This is not just an upgrade. Apple's newest phone was rebuilt from the ground up and you can feel it. The iPhone 5 is lighter than its predecessor and slimmer. That may sound good on paper, but you have to hold it to believe it since it looks quite similar to its predecessor in pictures. Apple has always been known for their innovative and tasteful design. As such, some critics have called the iPhone 5 the most beautiful thing they've ever made.
Tech nerds may point out superior specs on other phones, but it's hard to imagine the average smartphone consumer missing anything if they go with Apple. It's incredibly fast and the camera is excellent. If there's an app you're looking for it will almost certainly be available for this phone and the Retina Display lives up to the hype.
Apple disciples, your phone has arrived.
Samsung is a well-known and reliable electronics brand with an eye for form as well as function, and this phone follows that trend. The S3 brings excellent performance and tons of innovation on an Android platform in a well-designed, small package. The HD display is big and beautiful and the internal memory and 2GB RAM is more than enough.
The Samsung Galaxy S3 comes with the works: Android 4.0 Ice Cream Sandwich, 4G LTE/HSPA+ support, a fast dual-core processor and a fine 8-megapixel camera. The phone also has some cool sharing options that make it a good choice for social network freaks.
Nokia Lumia 920
If you want a Windows Phone this is one of your best bets.
The Nokia Lumia 920 is among the most powerful Windows Phones you can buy and the features are seemingly endless. The camera, which uses Pure View technology, is fantastic — with a WXGA (1,280 x 768-pixel) resolution.
The buttons are in just the right places, with camera keys, power and volume controls on the right side — easy to use with one hand.
The phone features a 4.5-inch display that performs beautifully. It's bright, crisp and you can even keep your gloves on while using it.
There have been complaints about the phone's battery life and chunky build. These are minor criticisms for a powerful phone at this price point.
Samsung Gravity TXT
Not everyone needs — or can afford — a high-end smartphone. For those folks, the Samsung Gravity TXT is here and is available at T-Mobile. It has an excellent, slide-out QWERTY keyboard that comes with dedicated buttons for messaging, web browsing and emoticons. It also has a Social Buzz button for access to social networks such as Twitter and Facebook.
This rugged, inexpensive phone continues to impress with a decent 1.9 megapixel camera that features smile detection and can record video. The battery life is plenty long and the phone is easy to use.
The Gravity TXT offers GPS navigation and also supports memory cards up to 32GB.