Author defends his book after student requests quick summary online

When the film version of the assigned reading is just not an option, today's indolent students take their procrastination to the Internet.

One such student did just that when he requested a quick summary of The Boy Who Couldn't Sleep And Never Had To on Yahoo! Answers. But the Yahoo! user who goes by the name of ♥ Idiot America ~ ϟƘƦІןן∑x ♥ must have been shocked to find a response from the most unlikely of sources: DC Pierson, the author of the book.

"Hi! My name's DC Pierson, I wrote the book 'The Boy Who Couldn't Sleep And Never Had To,'" the author replied. "First off, I'm really excited that my book is being suggested for summer reading. On the other hand, I'm bummed out that you don't want to try and finish it, and not even because you think it's bad, but just because it seems like work instead of like fun."

But before delving into a patronizing diatribe on the importance of reading, Pierson shows sympathy for the student's plight while doing his best to sell the book.

"I'm not going to sit here and act like I didn't sometimes not read assigned books for class in high school. Even though it's referenced once in my book, the book you're avoiding reading, I've never actually read "The Scarlet Letter." So I'm sympathetic to your plight. But I think you'll find there's a ton more sex, swearing, and drugs in my book than anything else you have been or will be assigned in high school, and I don't mean in the way your teacher will tell you "You know, Shakespeare has more sex and violence than an R-rated movie!" I mean it's all there, in terms you will readily understand without having to Google them. Plus not once do I refer to anything as a "bare bodkin" or anything like that."

You've got to tip your hat to DC Piersen. He could have easily taken the lack of interest personally, or condemned the sheer laziness, at the very least. But instead, Piersen attempted to encourage the student to finish the book with some of the wittiest self-promotion I've ever seen.

Click here to check out the entire thread on Yahoo! Answers.