Count Binface praises Keir Starmer and reveals his dad was not a toolmaker

Count Binface has announced he will be standing as a candidate in the General Election for Richmond and Northallerton (Aaron Chown/PA) (PA Wire)
Count Binface has announced he will be standing as a candidate in the General Election for Richmond and Northallerton (Aaron Chown/PA) (PA Wire)

Londoner’s Diary

Count Binface is back on the campaign trail. He revealed his electoral ambitions to us last year to go for “the double” – to run for London Mayor and to get a seat in parliament at the next election. While London Mayor was not within his reach (he got 1% of the vote, placing 11th and beating Britain First) Binface is hopeful for polling day. “If Farage can get in, surely anyone can get in,” he told us. He announced last weekend his name will officially be on the ballot paper in the prime minister’s seat of Richmond and North Allerton.

“I’ve recharged my space batteries after the usual kerfuffle of getting your name onto the ballot,” he told us. When asked of his as of yet unreleased policies but Binface was coy. “You can expect to see certain policies that are Binface longstanding plegdes,” he said. His campaign launch party details are equally nebulous (“All will be done in the fullness of time”).

What does Binface think of the much prophesized Labour landslide victory? “I think voters are going to vote for Sir Keir because he looks like someone vaguely sane and vaguely competent,” he said.

“A Labour landslide without the optimism of the Blair era would be astonishing because it would be a landslide for nothing, but just against everything that’s happened in the last 14 years, which is fair enough considering how appalling the last 14 years have been,” he added.

Most importantly though, Binface revealed, “My dad was not a toolmaker.”