Advertisement

Duffy praised by Rape Crisis for going public with details of ordeal

A national rape charity has praised the bravery of the pop singer Duffy for going public with harrowing details of how she was drugged, held captive and raped early in her career.

On Sunday Duffy posted details of an ordeal which she kept secret for a decade, hoping that it might bring comfort to others that it is possible to “come out of the darkness”.

Katie Russell, the national spokeswoman for Rape Crisis in England and Wales, said it was “a really bold move to speak publicly and really commendable”.

“We know through our frontline work at Rape Crisis why so few victims and survivors do speak about what has happened to them, or indeed report it to the police,” Russell said.

“It is because there is a lot of shame and stigma still attached to being raped or sexually assaulted and there are a lot of myths and stereotypes out there around the kind of people it happens to. In speaking out Duffy is reaching out to those people who maybe are suffering on their own.

“When people in the public eye speak about their experiences it really does help to encourage debate and widen understanding. That’s really important because there is still a lack of understanding and we don’t talk enough about rape and sexual violence.”

Duffy, whose full name is Aimee Duffy, had huge success with her debut album Rockferry which became the biggest selling album of 2008 in the UK, winning her three Brits and a Grammy. It included the international hit Mercy. After a less successful follow up album Endlessly in 2010, Duffy gradually began retreating from the public eye.

In February she revealed she was a survivor of rape. On Sunday, Duffy, aged 35, went into far greater detail about her traumatic ordeal and the decade of secretly living with the experience.

She said some people had warned her not to speak out, that it might finish any attempt to make music publicly again. “If I destroy my future, I do it to honour my past,” she writes.

“Rape stripped me of my human rights, to experience a life with autonomy from fear. It has already stolen one third of my life. Deep down I do know it would have been a shame and done such an immense disservice to my existence to just delete myself and forget about what I had experienced in music publicly.”

Warning that the details are upsetting, Duffy writes that she was celebrating her birthday in a restaurant when she was drugged.

“I was drugged then for four weeks and travelled to a foreign country. I can’t remember getting on the plane and came round in the back of a travelling vehicle.

“I was put into a hotel room and the perpetrator returned and raped me. I remember the pain and trying to stay conscious in the room after it happened. I was stuck with him for another day, he didn’t look at me, I was to walk behind him, I was somewhat conscious and withdrawn. I could have been disposed of by him.”

Duffy writes that she did not feel safe going to the police straight away but eventually did talk to two female police officers about what had happened to her. “The identity of the rapist should be only handled by the police, and that is between me and them.”

She continues: “I am sharing this because we are living in a hurting world and I am no longer ashamed … I believe that if you speak from the heart within you, the heart within others will answer. As dark as my story is, I do speak from my heart, for my life, and for the life of others, whom have suffered the same.”

Russell said every victim or survivor’s story was unique but there were common experiences articulated by Duffy which will help others, particularly in these times of self-isolation and lockdown.

They include taking time to process the trauma, suicidal thoughts and “feelings of low self-worth, feelings of shame and self-blame”.

“A big part of our work is supporting people to cope with those symptoms, to recover, to move forward positively with their lives … statements like Duffy’s can only serve to help that.”