Experiments With Rough Sex: Here's How You Can Set Some Boundaries Without Killing the Fun
For many of us, sex defines as letting go of all the inhibitions and just enjoying the moment. Nowadays, numerous folks are treading down the path of rough sex and studies have shown that approximately 70% of people enjoy BDSM or rough sex. However, things can get ugly when the definition of rough sex is not the same for you and your partner.
Thanks to the books and porn which showcases women as the submissive, coy one in the bedroom, and most men love that. Now, being submissive is not at all wrong and is a matter of personal choice. What is however disturbing is that women hardly speak about what they want or don’t want from their partners in bed. There can be infinite reasons for this, one being, the fear of not satisfying your partner or the fear of hurting your partner’s ego.
There is nothing to be ashamed of while asking your partner to set boundaries for rough sex. So, keeping in mind opinions by some experts, we have collated a few tips which can help enhance your experience.
Consent is compulsory
If it’s done without consent, it’s assault. Consent is essential not only for sexual health but also for mental health. On the other hand, remember that consent can always be taken back too. There can be things which you tried in the past but don't enjoy anymore and it’s absolutely cool.
Conversation is the key
It's a task for women to define sexual boundaries as we are expected to be accommodating. But in reality, setting boundaries is a conversation that must not stop. Sit with your partner over a glass of wine and discuss things that you would like to explore and hear them out too. Over time, you may feel differently about things you’ve enjoyed and may want to tweak accordingly.
Play some games
Now that you have the conversation rolling, it’s time to spice things up! Start off with a list of kinky acts which you and your partner would like to do and create yes, no, maybe checkboxes beside it. This is a great way of easing things out and having a lot more fun.
Be blunt
By now you know what works for both of you and have set your boundaries successfully. This is the right time to ask your partner to do things with you and add a touch of sexiness to it. You can just choose to whisper or text them your thoughts and see how it goes.
Be open about sexual health
We’ve said it before and we will say it again - Your sexual and mental health matters. Set safety standards for yourself and help your partner too. Nothing is a bigger mood killer than being anxious about not taking proper precautions. An honest conversation regarding STI, birth control, and other issues can really help build a healthier and mature relationship.
Never tolerate disrespect
If your boundaries, desires, and expectations are not respected, then it's time to walk out that door.
All of this might sound intimidating but take it easy. Take one step at a time and always be open to consult to a medical professional in case you have specific queries or want to have a more detailed chat.
(Edited by Varnika Gupta)