Jennifer Love Hewitt Learned Her Mom Died from the Press: 'I Didn't Get a Goodbye Moment with Her' (Exclusive)

Jennifer Love Hewitt still remembers the heartbreaking moment she learned that her mother had died.

In the preface to her new book, Inheriting Magic: My Journey Through Grief, Joy, Celebrating, and Making Every Day Magical, the actress and producer, 47, writes of the moment she lost her mother, Pat, to cancer in 2012 at age 67. Hewitt was scheduled to attend a TV festival in Monaco, but was hesitant to leave her mother. After landing in Monaco, Hewitt learned that her mother had died.

"The one thing I didn't put in the book that I've been talking about afterwards ... maybe didn't want that to be the focus ... But that day, the press actually knew that my mom had passed before I did, which was such a crazy feeling," Hewitt tells PEOPLE for a story in this week's print issue. "When I landed and I heard his voice at the airport, I knew in that moment that he would not have left her side if she was still with us."

"He was waiting for me at the airport, and it had already been published somewhere that my mom had passed," she continues. "And there was just a lot of stuff about that day that was just so out of my control."

Now, in her new book, Hewitt is sharing her grief journey with readers, as well as spreading her and Pat's inclination for finding joy. A blend of memoir, self-help and party-planning, Inheriting Magic encourages turning “sorrow to celebration,” per the book’s description, and look at ways to bring light into our lives.

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Today, Hewitt is celebrating new joys in life. The former teen star, known for shows like Party of Five, is seeing success playing 911 dispatcher Maddie Han on the TV drama 9-1-1; her daughter, Autumn, 10, recently earned her SAG card after acting alongside her mom on the show. Hewitt’s whole family, including Autumn, husband Brian Hallisay, 46, and sons Atticus, 9 and Aidan, 3, also appear in her new Lifetime Christmas movie, The Holiday Junkie, out Dec. 14.

But Hewitt is also still thinking of her mother, and remembering the ways she pushed her to where she is today.

“If you had asked me when my mom was still on the planet if I could live without her, I would’ve said no,” Hewitt says. “So I’m really proud of myself.”

Read below for an exclusive excerpt from the preface of Inheriting Magic.

In June 2012 I was asked to attend a TV festival in Monaco. My mom had been diagnosed with cancer in February; she’d had surgery, started chemotherapy and was feeling hopeful. My mom and I had been to Monaco together before, and had an amazing time. She loved to travel and begged me to go on this trip because she couldn’t, but this time I didn’t want to go. So we decided that we would plan her cancer-free party before I left for the airport. It would be our biggest party yet! It helped us both to see the light at the end of the cancer tunnel. Something just didn’t feel right that day about leaving, but it would only be a few quick days, and then back to party planning. That was our promise to each other. Before I took off, I texted my mom a picture of me holding champagne and said, “Cheers!” She texted back, “Cheers!” with a picture of her in a silly rainbow wig filter. It was perfect. It was her.

But it was the last exchange I would have with my mom. After landing in Monaco, I turned on my phone and saw three missed calls from a phone number I didn’t recognize. There was a message from my mom’s friend: “She had a rough night and got very sick. She’s in the hospital.” I knew deep down that I shouldn’t have left her, and that I would never forgive myself.

As I tried to get more information, the hours passed. My brother was on his way to Los Angeles, but I couldn’t get a flight out until the next morning. My mother was in a coma and doctors were giving her a 20 percent chance to make it. It felt like a nightmare, and I was begging to wake up. My mom and I were planning our biggest party yet. This couldn’t be happening. I was able to get the next flight out and made it home, but never got the chance to say goodbye.

I’d walked out of her front door hopeful and laughing, and now I could barely walk in because she was gone. My whole life changed. I changed.

Later, in processing my grief, I began to feel very deeply that my mom and I weren’t supposed to say goodbye. We were supposed to be laughing, planning a party and excited for the joy it would bring us and others. That’s what we loved to do, and in our last moment together that’s what we did. We planned one hell of a party. I found myself through grief — as a wife, mommy, magic-maker and Holiday Junkie.

Excerpted with permission from Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Inheriting Magic (BenBella Books; December 2024)
Inheriting Magic
is now available, wherever books are sold.

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