I Lived My Best Socially Distanced Life in Montauk
True story: I spent six months straight in a 300-square-foot studio apartment in New York City with another person (it’s my boo, so it’s mostly fine).
During that time, we mastered the art of the park picnic, watched more reality TV than is healthy, and drank our body weight in rosé. And even though we didn’t murder each other, we were definitely ready for some freaking space.
Enter, Mercedes. The bougie car brand I’d happily name my firstborn after reached out and asked if I’d like to borrow its new 2020 Mercedes-AMG C 63 S Cabriolet, which happens to be a convertible. And I was like, hell freaking yes!
Besides the ability to escape the city, I was amped to test-drive the fancy-ass convertible featuring heated and cooled seats, an amazing sound system, a lowkey sexual engine growl when you start the car, a speedometer that was projected onto the windshield, and the rearview camera.
To my very untrained eye (my last car was a 2004 Alero, google it), those features alone were enough to steal my heart. But I should also mention that the car had different “modes” to make driving in different situations easier. Oh, and my favorite part: how damn fancy I looked driving it.
We knew we needed to stay within the state of New York to comply with the Centers for Disease Control’s best practices, so we set our sights on beautiful Montauk (that’s the Hamptons, guys!). More specifically, we reached out to The Surf Lodge in Montauk, a gorge boutique hotel normally open to hotel guests and the public for day drinking and food. In light of COVID-19, the hotel changed things up so that only guests were allowed on the property. Additionally, they put extra measures in place to ensure social distancing (more on that in a sec).
It seemed like a safe bet! Thankfully, they were into us as much as we were into them, and the rest is history. Here’s how we planned le perfect getaway within the CDC’s social distancing guidelines—and had a blast doing it.
The drive
When we picked up our new car/child, it was love at first sight. Of course, we got way too excited and immediately rolled the top down to begin the three-ish hour drive from Manhattan to the Hamptons. Two hours in, I had a brand new seat-belt sunburn/tan line across my chest. I wore it like a badge of honor.
If you’ve never been to the Hamptons, let me lay this out for you: There’s one two-lane highway in and out. While that means hella traffic, it also provides the optimum location for people watching and looking like a baller in your new Mercedes convertible.
The hotel
Keeping our friends, fam, and the residents of Montauk safe was our number one priority, so we made sure that we stayed in a hotel that also respected the seriousness of COVID-19.
Here’s what the Surf Lodge has in place to protect guests and employees:
Employees wear masks at all times
Employees are tested weekly
Contactless sanitizing stations
Both in-house cleaning and professional commercial cleaning
Encouraging staff to social distance outside of work
Immediate response and transparency to a positive test
In addition to that, signs were posted throughout the property to notify guests that masks were mandatory when walking through or resting in indoor public spaces or spaces where social distancing isn’t possible, like the bathroom or ordering a drink at the bar. We were happy to do all of that.
When we pulled into the gravel parking lot of the Surf Lodge, I felt right at home in the casual-chic space. The contactless check-in process was smooth as hell. When we got to our room, there was a strip of tape across the door indicating that no one had been inside after it was cleaned, and after punching in a code on the door’s keypad, we were in! The gorge decor was everything my aspiring coastal elite heart desired. Shabby-sophisticated decor, a clean color palette, and a deck with a hammock overlooking a cute little pond packed with ducks. Nature!
Even though we trusted the Surf Lodge team, we whipped out our antibacterial wipes and got to work sanitizing all the frequently touched spaces, Lysol’ing the air, and opening the windows to let fresh air in.
Although the restaurant was closed, the bar was fully stocked and ready for our masked selves. We grabbed our drinks and plopped onto a couple of isolated chairs near the water, sipped some tequila, and read approximately two pages from our books we said we’d finish that weekend.
The outdoor dining
A couple of hours later, it was off to the stunning Greek restaurant, Calissa, which featured an outdoor seating space as big as my wedding venue and tables perfectly spaced six feet apart. TBH, this was my first restaurant experience since March 12, 2020—and it was incredible.
Besides the jaw-dropping views (and v good people-watching ops), the food was fresh and the portions were generous! We started off with pretty tequila cocktails, the tzatziki, and Spanish octopus before moving on to the grilled local swordfish and branzino…and of course all the desserts. Literally all of them. And then I died.
The beach
The next day, we sat on the beautiful deck, chomped on complimentary avocado toast from the hotel chef, who was in prepping for a one-night outdoor dinner that evening. Then we rode the Surf Lodge’s complimentary (who doesn’t love a complimentary anything?!) bikes to the beach less than 10 minutes away. It was maybe the cutest thing we’ve ever done as a couple. I mean, the bikes were beach cruisers with baskets! Are you kidding me?!?!
We piled up sand to make our recliners and planted our butts down for the next several hours. That’s when disaster struck: The wind picked up a beach umbrella and smacked me in the back of the head. It was traumatizing, but a giant bottle of rosé helped me heal (along with some ice from a really nice stranger! Thanks, girl!).
It wasn’t until a massive wave washed out our towel/sand chairs that we decided to let nature win that day.
The state park
With a little extra time on our hands, we drove (top down, obvi) to Montauk Point State Park, which is basically a giant cliff that drops off into the ocean and looks like the end of the world. The views were stunning, worthy of an epic Taylor Swift music video à la Wildest Dreams—and so was the drive to get there.
The hotel dinner
When we got back to the hotel for dinner, we were seated on the gorgeous outdoor deck. That’s when I realized we hit the people-watching jackpot. There were some of the chicest hipsters I’d ever seen in wide-brimmed hats, overalls, and fashion face masks. I was happy that each table was spaced more than six feet apart and the guests and staff all wore masks when getting drinks from the bar or going to the bathroom.
I also spotted an actual Real Housewife seated about 80 feet away from me. I want to respect her privacy, but I’m not a monster: Her name rhymes with Blamona Blinger (and she did wear a mask to go the bathroom).
The creeper-bait entertainment was on point, but the food was even better. We buckled in for a five-course prix fixe meal with fresh fish, seasonal fruits and veggies, and super-tender filet. Honestly, it was all too much to handle—in the best way.
The fitness scene
Because fancy New York City ladies often summer in the Hamptons and require that their fancy NYC workouts follow them there, the boutique fitness studio scene is bumping. But in COVID-19 Times, not many studios are open (because DUH!). However, Soul Cycle Montauk had a whole outdoor setup that made me feel good about group workouts for the first time in months. Apparently, they’ve already launched outdoor pop-ups across the country too.
The bikes were outside, spaced six feet apart, and we all wore headphones to hear the instructor and the music “silent disco” style. There was a strong breeze, which made me feel even better about the outdoor workout class, and it felt good to be “in class” again.
When we headed back to the city to return the car, we were sad to let her go. But those 2.5 days felt like a week, especially since we were used to our Netflix-chill-repeat routine.
While I’d love to do this every weekend, it is a pricey place to post up in. That said, I’m not ruling it out. I’ll just be over here saving all my dollars for a Mercedes convertible.
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