Man faces backlash over ‘selfish’ wedding proposal plan: ‘You shouldn’t usurp other people’s events’

·2 min read

A woman planned a vacation for over a dozen friends but became furious when an engagement proposal started to pull focus.

She went on Reddit’s “Am I the A******” forum for advice. She and her 15 friends are all turning 40 next year. To celebrate, she planned a trip for the entire group next year. That trouble arose when a friend asked if he could use the trip to propose. 

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“Many of my friends are turning 40 next year, so I asked my closest friend Jenn in the group if she wanted to do a shared birthday and make a big trip out of it,” she wrote. “I planned and booked a trip for the group. Researched destinations, flights, accommodations, activities, booked and organized everything, coordinated schedules for 16 people, etc. The trip is early next year, and I just found out her long-term partner is planning to propose on that trip. I asked if he could possibly find another occasion and offered to help plan another trip for the group before or after to celebrate and surprise her with the proposal.”

Jenn’s boyfriend did not react positively to the request.

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“He was p***** and said I was super selfish for wanting to make the trip ‘all about me,’ and I feel terrible,” she explained. “Maybe I am being a big spoiled baby. But I feel like it changed from being an ‘us’ trip celebrating the milestone together to an engagement trip and party. They’ve been together almost a decade, so the proposal is a big deal, and I am SO happy for them, but I feel kind of taken for granted for all the work I put into planning with no help, and now the trip will be all about the engagement and wedding planning. I’m feeling like the butthole and now am super guilty.”

Reddit users thought the poster was in the right.

“You shouldn’t usurp other people’s events,” a user commented

“He is the selfish one for usurping an event that should be about you and your friend,” another said

“He’s hijacking your plans,” a person wrote.

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