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MLB Power Rankings: Carlos Gomez gives Brewers some punch

MLB Power Rankings: Carlos Gomez gives Brewers some punch

On the anonymity of being a Yankee, David Price's secret weapon and Matt Harvey's secret message:

The rankings (records through Wednesday):

Milwaukee
Milwaukee

1. Milwaukee Brewers (16-6; Previous: 7) – Maybe when all these pitchers stop worrying about what Carlos Gomez does after he hits a line drive, they can figure a way to keep him from doing it.


Oakland
Oakland

2. Oakland Athletics (13-8; Previous: 5) – A's decline 10-year lease offer from Oakland Coliseum Authority, opt for parole instead.


Atlanta
Atlanta

3. Atlanta Braves (14-7; Previous: 8) – NL ERA leader is Harang. Also, accurately describes what agent had to do to get NL ERA leader a job.


Texas
Texas

4. Texas Rangers (14-8; Previous: 18) – Rangers have to recall utility infielder from minors, as their disabled list is packed like Sardinas.


Los Angeles
Los Angeles

5. Los Angeles Dodgers (13-9; Previous: 4) – Dodgers' new slogan: "Live. Breathe. Blue." Also accurately describes guy whose Dodger dog went down wrong pipe.


New York
New York

6. New York Yankees (12-9; Previous: 14) – Pineda learns there is fine line between "a little pine tar to assist your grip" and "holy crap the levees have given way."


Detroit
Detroit

7. Detroit Tigers (10-8; Previous: 2) – Cabrera hitting more ground balls than ever. According to Sabermetric guys, very few of those go for home runs.


St. Louis
St. Louis

8. St. Louis Cardinals (12-10; Previous: 9) – Matheny says there is "neither subterfuge nor skullduggery" in secret pitching plans. Admits a little subterduggery, though.


Washington
Washington

9. Washington Nationals (12-10; Previous: 1) – Bryce Harper has never peeled off in his life. It's why he wears real eye black and not those silly stickers.


Tampa Bay
Tampa Bay

10. Tampa Bay Rays (10-11; Previous: 6) – Mauer knocks comebacker off Price's cup, which Price called, "The best place to hit me." Second-best, apparently: Glove.



Toronto
Toronto

11. Toronto Blue Jays (11-10; Previous: 16) – Blue Jays starting to think Reyes is here for the free health care.


San Francisco
San Francisco

12. San Francisco Giants (12-10; Previous: 3) – Giants win Green Glove Award for excellence in recycling, special consideration for thinking of having Rich Aurilia back.


Colorado
Colorado

13. Colorado Rockies (12-11; Previous: 22) – Rockies' ERA still better at home than on road. Suspicion abounds all of Denver has been placed under humidor bubble.


Kansas City
Kansas City

14. Kansas City Royals (10-10; Previous: 15) – Moustakas: "Home runs, they're nice." Tomorrow will weigh in on hammocks, English gardens, chubby puppies.


Los Angeles
Los Angeles

15. Los Angeles Angels (10-11; Previous: 17) – Ibanez hitting well below weight, but still slightly ahead of age.


Boston
Boston

16. Boston Red Sox (10-12; Previous: 10) – You just knew it couldn't last.


Cleveland
Cleveland

17. Cleveland Indians (10-11; Previous: 13) – Danny Salazar fears he's been tipping pitches. Vows to stop moving his lips while reading catcher's signs.


Pittsburgh
Pittsburgh

18. Pittsburgh Pirates (9-13; Previous: 11) – Snider rightly suspended for using his face to viciously bloody Maldonado's fist.


San Diego
San Diego

19. San Diego Padres (10-12; Previous: 23) – In the case of total bullpen annihilation, comforting to know that Donn Roach would survive.


Cincinnati
Cincinnati

20. Cincinnati Reds (10-11; Previous: 20) – Satellite image spots elusive Loch Ness Monster. Also, Billy Hamilton's on-base percentage.


Baltimore
Baltimore

21. Baltimore Orioles (10-10; Previous: 19) – Blue Jays have umpires inspect Miguel Gonzalez's glove for foreign substance. Find nothing but domestic stuff.


New York
New York

22. New York Mets (11-10; Previous: 27) – Matt Harvey holds up middle finger to camera, tweets it, later explains he was referencing total number of ulnar collateral ligaments left in his body.


Miami
Miami

23. Miami Marlins (10-12; Previous: 21) – The Marlins just played first day game at Marlins Park with roof open. Was only way to get the new surfboard home.


Philadelphia
Philadelphia

24. Philadelphia Phillies (10-11; Previous: 25) – Burnett exasperated by Puig attempt to throw him out at first on single. Observes Burnett: "I'm 37 with a hernia. Take it easy."


Chicago
Chicago

25. Chicago White Sox (11-11; Previous: 24) – Sale says all's well while "taking a shower, drying off, putting on shirts," so maybe he can't pitch, but he's ready for dinner and a movie.


Minnesota
Minnesota

26. Minnesota Twins (10-10; Previous: 29) – Colabello played many years in Can-Am League, where they got to all their games via 1970s muscle cars.


Seattle
Seattle

27. Seattle Mariners (8-13; Previous: 12) – Yeah, but think of all those T-shirts they sold.


Chicago
Chicago

28. Chicago Cubs (7-13; Previous: 28) – It's OK. They're pacing themselves.


Houston
Houston

29. Houston Astros (7-15; Previous: 30) – A man of Bo Porter's stature should not be toppling water jugs in Oakland dugout. He knows A's have a plumbing problem.


Arizona
Arizona

30. Arizona Diamondbacks (6-18; Previous: 26) – Diamondbacks wonder if they could be this bad, get hammered by Cubs, nod solemnly.


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