Single mom posts honest selfie about 'real' motherhood
“This is motherhood,” says Aly Brothers in a Facebook post that has since gone viral.
The single mother recently posted an open letter on her Facebook page about the difficulty of raising two kids solo.
“No fancy filters, no good lighting, no new lipstick. It’s messy hair that’s wet from the rain, yesterday’s makeup that I was too tired to wash off, and tears. Motherhood is HARD. Single-motherhood is HARD.”
Brothers tells the story about how she ran out of milk the day the photo was taken and so she took her two boys to the store to get some more. While her kids are normally pretty well-behaved, this day, they were not.
“My youngest cried almost the entire time we were in the store. He didn’t want to sit in the cart, he didn’t want to be buckled, he wanted to hold all the groceries on his lap. He got mad. He threw his shoe, he threw my wallet, he threw the three groceries that did fit on his lap. And he cried. And people stared.”
“My three year old wanted to be superman and stand on the cart. That was fine. I told him to hold on and stand straight. He did not. He fell off, he leaned backwards and knocked things off their displays. He leaned back and bumped a stranger.”
Trying to take control of the situation, Brothers spotted some balloons, telling the kids they could have one if they shared. They initially agreed until they hit the cash register where a total meltdown ensued.
“They screamed, they cried, they fought. I handed the balloon to another cashier to be put back and they cried louder. My youngest pushed buttons on the card machine while my oldest picked up candy. The people in line behind me glared. The cashier glared. Everyone’s eyes were on me as if to say ‘can’t you control your own children.’ One older gentleman whispered, ‘she’s pretty young for two kids’ and I lost it.”
Brothers explains how she then began to cry herself.
“They don’t know me. They don’t know me as a mother. They don’t know my children. They don’t know I was married before I started a family. They don’t know I left that marriage because of abuse knowing I would have it just as hard as a single mother. It’s hard people. The glares and whispers and judgments are hard.”
By sharing her story (and selfie), Brothers hopes other moms having a rough day will feel a little less alone.
“Sometimes I can control my children and sometimes I can’t. Sometimes they listen and sometimes they don’t. Sometimes I can handle it and sometimes I break down. I know these days will pass, the tears will stop, the fighting will cease, and my babies will be grown. And that will be hard too. So if you see a parent struggling, if you see a kid throwing a tantrum, if you see a mom on the verge of tears…please say something nice. Please don’t glare with judgement,” she pleads.
“And to all moms out there having a day like mine…I see you, I know you, I love you. You are strong and you are doing just fine.”
Since posting, the photo has been shared nearly 14,000 times with thousands of comments from other parents voicing their understanding.
“Been there, done that. You will survive and your children will respect you all the more for it! Chin up, it gets better,” said Cherie DeBaillon Scallan.
“I’m crying with you!” said McKenzie Katt. “I’ve gone through this before and it is not fun. You’re doing great! Some people will judge regardless of what you do.”
What do you think of this post? Let us know by tweeting to @YahooStyleCA.
