Sweat, tears and terrible gigs: why heavy metal is just like standup
My name is Ed Gamble, and I love heavy metal. I say it loud, and I say it proud. Ideally, I would scream it from the top of a volcano while wearing a loincloth and holding a broadsword, but this is tricky logistically. I have been obsessed from the age of 13, ever since I first heard System of a Down, Slipknot and Deftones. They were my gateway drugs, and it wasn’t long before I was scuttling around the genre’s darker alleyways, mainlining Slayer, Pantera and Cradle of Filth.
I know that some people’s reaction to metal is to laugh at it, but this only makes us metal fans stronger. In fact, it is probably part of what attracted me to it. It’s a community. Granted, it’s a community where I once saw a man set fire to his own pubic hair in the queue for a gig, but you can’t have a 100% hit rate. I have never felt more welcomed and at home than at a metal show; arms round two topless, tattooed men I don’t know, all screaming along to whatever horrible noise is being smashed out from the stage.
It was for similar reasons that I was drawn to comedy. To an outsider, anyone who decides to do standup is insane. In the early years, you do terrible gigs to very few people in awful places. It should be a recipe for a miserable time. But it isn’t miserable, because you are sharing highs and lows with a bunch of likeminded folk. I remember the baffled faces of my family as I gleefully recounted going to Cardiff for a gig in front of four people. I was gigging Cardiff! I was an international comedian! This is not the detail they focused on. “Four people, what’s the point?” The point, DAD, is that two of those four seemed to enjoy my new bit about bras. And that, in standup terms, is a win.
Like performing standup comedy, most people can’t wrap their head round why anyone would listen to metal. “It’s just noise,” they say. Well, all music is noise. If you have a finely tuned ear you can distinguish between subgenres, appreciate the nuances. “It’s all noise” from someone who doesn’t listen to metal is akin to a vegan claiming that cheese is all “just cheddar”. By all means stay away from dairy, but you don’t get an opinion on the intricate flavour profiles.
There is nothing that can replace the high of doing comedy, and regardless of what you have to go through to get there, you keep chasing it. During the recording of my new podcast, Lifers, the metal musicians I talked to had the same outlook. I spoke to people who have lost legs and family members, and have given up any semblance of financial security. But no matter what sacrifices they have had to make, they keep on playing music because they love it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to sacrifice a goat to the dark lord. (Not really, I’m making celeriac soup for my fiancee.) Ed Gamble
Lifers With Ed Gamble is available to stream exclusively on Spotify
