'We have a lot more struggles': Life after fatal crash in Port Elgin
Inside the Moncton Hospital 18 months ago, Melissa Bourque remembers sitting at her son's bedside, unsure if he would live.
Jason Bourque wasn't wearing a seat belt and suffered severe brain damage, following a car accident in Port Elgin, about 35 kilometres northeast of Sackville N.B. The crash took the lives of two of his friends, Colby Callender, 18, of Sackville, and Chad Alder of Melrose, 16.
Although some of Jason's scars have healed, his life and the lives of his family, have changed forever.
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"I chose to take down my [family] pictures … if I look at things the way they were before until now, it really sucks," she said. "But if you look at things the day of the accident and on, it's good."
Months after the accident, Melissa said she wasn't sure if her son would ever regain consciousness, but he did and Jason became well enough to go to rehab in Fredericton. He returned to the family home on July 29, 2016.
The family of three live in a small two bedroom home in Port Elgin.
"I'm surprised, I don't know how we did it, but … [it] feels good," said Bourque.
"I don't stop, I lost 30 pounds … when he came home I was piggybacking him up and down the stairs."
Laughter is the best medicine
And Bourque admits, she uses humour as a coping mechanism.
"That's how I deal with everything, everything.
"I have to make jokes, I have to because if I don't I would have probably already have gone crazy."
Jason is now 18, and seems happy to joke back and forth with his mother. He throws out a curse word every now and then in an obvious attempt to tease his mother, which works.
Jason has noticeable scarring from an operation on his wrist and a dime sized scar in the centre of his neck, where a tube was inserted.
He is permanently disabled.
Jason has partial use of one hand, apparent when he types Facebook messages to his friends on an iPad. He speaks slowly with a slur, but is easily understood by his family and can walk with a deliberate shuffle with his brother, Nathan Bourque, standing protectively nearby.
Living in the moment
When Jason makes it to one end of the room, then starts back towards the couch on his own, his family is obviously excited.
They say he's never managed to make the turn on his own. Safely back on the couch Jason eases himself into a sitting position and gives a thumbs up, looking proud of his accomplishments.
He's come a long way since the accident and Melissa said she does her best to live in the moment and appreciate it.
She credits her younger son Nathan with keeping the household running.
Melissa said she turns to Nathan to help out when she needs a break, but acknowledges it's hard for both of them. At 17, he is set to graduate from high school this year.
A lot more struggles
"To ask him to watch him [Jason] is kind of hard too because he's losing a lot of his growing up years now, and that's kind of hard on me too," said an emotional Melissa.
Jason is also aware of the recent changes to the household.
Melissa said on a particularly difficult day, Jason told her, "When he had the accident he was telling himself that he had to stay and take care of his brother … and he said, 'Now I'm here and it's Nathan taking care of me.'"
Since the accident,the family has grown much closer. Before Melissa and Jason used to fight constantly, but now they've grown closer.
"Now he's stuck with me all the time," she said with a laugh.
Melissa admits that the household income isn't enough to keep up on her bills.
"It's really hard, it was hard before just being a single mom but now, now it's a lot harder," she said. "We have a lot more struggles."
Jason isn't sure what the future holds, but he'd like to return to school in September. Another thing he's sure of, is his family and their constant support.
"I love them both, they help me through life."
