Today is the 90th birthday of Prince Philip, The Duke of Edinburgh. Over his many years by Queen Elizabeth II's side, he has rarely minced words when it comes to how he really feels. Judging by the look on his face, the person who gave him those ear defenders is about to hear another Philip-ism.
Here's a few of Prince Philip's greatest quips (courtesy of Britain's The Independent):
On a trip to Canada (1976):
"We don't come here for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves."
On the recession in Britain (1981):
"A few years ago, everybody was saying we must have more leisure, everyone's working too much. Now that everybody's got more leisure time they are complaining they are unemployed. People don't seem to make up their minds what they want."
On Tom Jones - to Tom Jones - after a royal performance (1969):
"What do you gargle with — pebbles?"
He added the following day: "It is very difficult at all to see how it is possible to become immensely valuable by singing what I think are the most hideous songs."
On Duke of Edinburgh winners at the 50th anniversary of the award:
"Young people are the same as they always were. They are just as ignorant."
On petting a koala in Australia (1992):
"Oh no, I might catch some ghastly disease."
On a 13-year-old who hopes to become an astronaut:
"You could do with losing a little bit of weight."
On meeting a wheelchair-bound nursing home resident (2002):
"Do people trip over you?"
On his daughter, Princess Anne:
"If it doesn't fart or eat hay, she isn't interested."
On robots bumping into one another at the Science Museum (2000):
"They're not mating are they?"
On tartan designed for the papal visit (2010):
"That's a nice tie... Do you have any knickers in that material?"
For more quotes and some choice photos of the monarch, click here.