Jana Kramer Says She Questioned Herself as a Woman After Miscarriages: 'I Felt Broken'
The country singer, 39, says that her previous miscarriages gave her serious doubts about her ability to carry another baby
Jana Kramer's previous miscarriages gave her pause about trying for baby no. 3.
On the latest episode of her Whine Down podcast, the pregnant actress, 39, recalled a conversation with fiancé Allan Russell about the possibility of having a baby together, admitting she had serious reservations about the prospect.
Kramer recalled telling Russell, who is dad to a 16-year-old son, "If you really want one, I might not be your girl because I don't know if I can physically carry a baby again."
"He said, 'I've got my son and my stepdaughter, but it would be so beautiful to have something together.'"
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Related: Jana Kramer Is Pregnant, Expecting Baby with Fiancé Allan Russell: 'It's All a Blessing'
Kramer — who is mom to 4-year-old son Jace and daughter Jolie, 7, who she shares with ex-husband Mike Caussin — agreed but didn't think it was likely.
"I would love that, but if it's something of really wanting it, I don't want you to be like, 'Oh I should have been with someone else' because I, as a woman who has had a bunch of miscarriages, I feel broken," she admitted.
"I mean, I know I'm a woman, but when you miscarry that many times, you're like, 'Am I? Because I can't even carry a baby,'" she added, noting, "I don't want to relive that again, feeling that way. That was awful."
Kramer called the news of her pregnancy a "shock," and admitted telling previous prospective partners she wasn't interested in having more children.
"It was also freaky, because I bled so bad — like gushing blood. And I'm like, 'Here we go, I'm miscarrying.' And I'm bawling my eyes out and he's seeing it — I couldn't make it to the toilet," she shared.
"I'm bawling, and I'm like, 'I told you I couldn't do this' and I called my doctor and they're like, 'Baby's still there, but you have a big hemorrhage.'"
Saying it was the "worst nightmare when you've carried before," they monitored her carefully and the doctor told her, "It's 50/50" until the baby got bigger than the hemorrhage.
While she was discouraged, Russell chose to be positive about it and focus on helping her so she could rest.
"He would take Jace to school, he would do drop-offs," she shared. "Him and Mike would coordinate with soccer, and dropoffs. I was so sick. [He got me] anything I wanted, food-wise."
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