Phones down for Family Day and beyond, parenting blogger urges with #NoPhoneFamilyDay

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Putting down that phone, tablet or laptop on Family Day could become a valuable habit that improves the family unit, a parenting blogger says.

"We are not saying phones are bad or technology is bad, but what we are lacking now, is conversations," Gail Bell told The Homestretch this week.

"We are lacking eye-to-eye conversations with kids and that's how kids learn, that is how we model, that is how kids learn social cues, that's how they learn about the world and our family values."

The organization Bell co-founded, Calgary-based Parenting Power, is one of the groups behind the #NoPhoneFamilyDay campaign to get people talking, but to each other and face to face.

She says, despite what some parents may think, being detached from family members can sometimes start at the top.

"What we are seeing now is a disconnect, because parents feel like they are always with their kids, we are so busy as a family," Bell explains.

"But how children are feeling, and the research is out and the research is solid, 62 per cent of kids feel they have to compete with their parent's phone for their parent's attention, 54 per cent feel their parents check their phone too often and 32 per cent feel unimportant when parents get distracted by their phones."

The first step to behavioural change is awareness, the educator says.

"When we told our family about it, my daughter rolled her eyes because she has got streaks going and she is like, 'Mom I can't lose my streaks,'" Bell said, of the Snapchat photo-sharing activity.

"You need to talk about this as a family, you have to make a plan."

She said a family meal is a great place to start, and having a basket where everyone drops their phone or tablet ahead of time, can make it easier.

Let's think of this as a good thing

"Parents are role models. We have to know what we are doing. We can't be all over our kids saying 'Get off your phone,' when the stats are saying, [parents] are on our phone way more than our kids."

That's why you need to take time to talk about it and say, 'let's think of this as a good thing.'

Bell says if an entire Family Day without a mobile device seems too daunting, customize it.

"If a day is overwhelming, don't do a day. Do the afternoon or do every meal you have together," she said.

"We know conversation happens at the time."

The plan is to make #NoPhoneFamilyDay an annual event and beyond. "Our ultimate goal would be to have families do that consistently," Bell said.

Looking for some ideas this Family Day? CBC Calgary's Entertainment column has a few great ones, and Tourism Calgary has a few more.

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WIth files from The Homestretch