B.C. youth wants to start anew in Kamloops after homophobic bullying in Barriere

Destiny Paul came out as gay in March and has since been dating a girlfriend in Barriere, B.C., but she says she didn't anticipate it would result in a barrage of abuse from her school peers.

"[There's] definitely name-calling. There [have] been times where my girlfriend and I were pushed [and] accidentally bumped into… we've had threats about hurting us," Paul, 15, told host Shelley Joyce of CBC's Daybreak Kamloops about her encounter with a group of male students at Barriere Secondary School.

Paul says she initially brushed off the abuse and didn't think about reporting it to her mother and the school principal, but she says her silence led to the situation escalating.

Sitarah Buksh, Paul's girlfriend, says homophobic and misogynistic slurs began to appear as graffiti in a park in Barriere.

"It's honestly just a really bad level of disrespect — I don't know how somebody could go and write that about people, especially in a public place," Buksh told Daybreak Kamloops.

Paul says the boys, who she says she thinks were in Grade 10 or 11, even made threats to burn down her house and sent her Snapchat messages featuring a fake gun.

She says these incidents had a profound impact on her mental health.

"I've had depression, anxiety [and] serious anger issues. I have to take so much medication. I don't even want to go back to school.

"It makes me feel like absolute shit, honestly. It feels like I'm not a part of the community anymore," she said.

Destiny Paul, right, kisses her girlfriend, Sitarah Buksh, at school. Paul says the harassment she received in school has had a tremendous impact on her mental health. (Submitted by Starrlyn Muzyka)

Plan to move to Kamloops

Homophobia in Canadian schools hasn't significantly improved over the past decade, according to Egale Canada, a national LGBTQ advocacy group.

A report published by the organization in 2021 indicated that 62 per cent of LGBTQ students surveyed feel unsafe at school, a marginal decrease of two per cent from a similar report in 2011.

Paul says she reported the abuse to the school principal multiple times but to no avail.

"He would tell me, 'I'll deal with it later in the day when I'm not busy, and the next day the same kids will come to school and do the same thing.

"It's not gonna stop unless someone actually does something," she said.

To escape the bullies, Paul resorted to being home-schooled for several months and is planning to move to Kamloops for the next school year along with her mother.

"I would feel much more comfortable in Kamloops because there [are] so many more people [who] are part of our [LGBTQ+] community than in Barriere," she said.

Barriere, a community of fewer than 1,800 residents, is about 64 kilometres north of Kamloops.

Starrlyn Muzyka, Paul's mother, says she reported the Snapchat threat against her daughter to the RCMP and , after lengthy consideration, decided to put their house up for sale in preparation for the move.

"I've talked to parents. I've communicated with this school numerous times … nobody seems to want to help us.

"It just continues, and it seems to get worse, and then it gets better, and then it gets worse again — it's just a never-ending cycle. It's really hard to watch my daughter struggle," she told Daybreak Kamloops.

Destiny Paul, right, and her mother Starrlyn Muzyka, who says she's trying to sell her house in order to move to Kamloops with Paul. (Submitted by Starrlyn Muzyka)

In an emailed statement to CBC News, the B.C. RCMP confirmed it had received a report of harassment from Muzyka last May but did not provide further details about the outcome of its investigation.

School district vows to seriously investigate bullying

Rhonda Nixon, the superintendent of the Kamloops-Thompson School District, which oversees schools in Kamloops and neighbouring areas, including Barriere, said the reports of abuse would be investigated.

Nixon also said the school district has an assistant superintendent in charge of promoting an inclusive environment for LGBTQ students.

"We take part in the Pride parade. We celebrate diversity. We have a diversity calendar where we actually make sure that we celebrate what happens with all of our students who are diverse," she said.

Ashton O'Brien with the Kamloops Pride Society, which is organizing Pride Week events for Aug. 21-27, contacted Muzyka to offer support, including guidance on documenting instances of bullying.

"I honestly wish that it was an isolated thing, but it isn't — I know that it is something that some students do struggle with."

O'Brien says that the Kamloops Pride Society plans to discuss with the school district how to better support LGBTQ students in Barriere.