Is everyone talking about how you embarrassed yourself last night? Unlikely, it's probably just 'hangxiety'

Have you ever felt embarrassed — maybe even completely ashamed of yourself — after a night of intoxicated celebration, but not really for any reason in particular?

Well, that might be the "hangxiety" talking.

Hangxiety is a pop-cultural buzzword for feeling extremely anxious while hungover. Yes, it's a mash-up of hangover and anxiety, and it's just as awful as it sounds.

It can be described as the neurotic, negative emotional side-effects of drinking alcohol, and young people online are creating the conversation.

On TikTok, #hangxiety has over 180 million views worldwide. Most of the videos associated with the hashtag are typically younger adults cringing or making fun of what they said or did the night before — from drunk texting an ex to forgetting how they got home. They're often worried about how they might have embarrassed themselves.

"It's not like I did anything bad, but my brain is telling me that I'm embarrassed," said Claire Tiemstra, a 20-something Calgarian who describes hangxiety as dread and doom of what "drunk Claire" did.

"I haven't done anything too crazy when I've been drunk, but I've definitely had quite a few days where I've spent the next day really anxious and hungover.… I just feel so embarrassed, you know?"

And she's not alone.

Pat Nicholls, who is in his early 30s, says he's typically not an anxious person at all, but if a night out is factored into the equation, waking up in the morning can feel particularly cringe.

"It's this feeling that my gut is being ripped out," he said, describing what hangxiety feels like.

"And then your brain just lets nerves take over."

But Nicholls and Tiemstra both shared that hangxiety isn't happening because they remember doing something inappropriate, or even particularly controversial. It just happens.

Physical consequences

So is everyone actually talking about how embarrassing and weird you were?

Probably not.

Andrew Kim, assistant professor in the department of psychology at the University of Calgary, specializes in addiction psychology. He says there are real, physiological reasons for why hangovers make you feel anxious.

"Given that [alcohol] is a central nervous system depressant, which means it slows down our body, one of the symptoms of alcohol withdrawal is an increase in anxiety," Kim said.

After a night of heavy drinking, increased heart rate, sweating, nausea and jitters are all physical symptoms of both a hangover, alcohol withdrawal and anxiety, he says.

Andrew Kim, assistant professor in the department of psychology, directs the Addictions and Mental Health Laboratory at the University of Calgary. (Submitted by Andrew Kim)

Whether it's at a party or just over the holidays, some choose to drink alcohol to wind-down and celebrate.

"[Drinking alcohol] makes us a little disinhibited, right? That term, 'liquid courage,'" said Kim.

But it's easy to overdo it. He says it can happen fast, where someone will consume enough to experience a brownout (where the night feels kind of fuzzy) or blackout (where you remember nothing at all) and it varies per person.

"It might contribute to that feeling of, 'I might have said or done something that is embarrassing, or something that I might not have done otherwise.'"

Waking up with some gaps in your memories might be making you worried about what could have happened, which is why Kim says dosage is a key component of enjoying alcohol safely and responsibly.

According to the Canadian Centre on Substance Use and Addiction, one standard drink is 17.05 millilitres pure alcohol — essentially the equivalent of one beer or glass of wine, or 1.5 ounces of a 40 proof spirit.

In its report on alcohol and health, the centre notes that consuming more than two standard drinks per occasion increases the risk of alcohol-related harm.

Further, young adults are typically considered to be more at risk of binge drinking, says Kim.

And more serious consequences exist.

Data from StatsCan found that a higher proportion of young adults under 25 reported harm due to alcohol use in the past year than their older counterparts.

Hangxiety: The 'final boss' of a night out

The concept of hangxiety has been explored by the New York Times, Vogue, Cosmopolitan, CNN and even CBC News. However, the concept is still fairly new, and researchers haven't quite nailed down one single definition of what it is or why it happens.

But with all the online hangxiety discourse, there seems to be somewhat of a social phenomenon going on.

"I'm definitely not the only one who's had hangxiety before," said Tiemstra. "Everyone in this generation is kind of dealing with it."

'I'm definitely not the only one who's had hangxiety before,' said Claire Tiemstra. 'Everyone in this generation is kind of dealing with it.' (Submitted by Claire Tiemstra)

So what's making young people feel especially "hangxious"?

Anecdotally, the people who spoke with CBC News said the ubiquitous presence of technology is adding a layer of bad vibes to what is supposed to be a good time.

"It's to do with my phone, to be honest," said Nicholls.

"One thousand per cent, that is the sole reason for my hangxiety. This damn device."

For Nicholls, he believes hangxiety for his generation likely stems from being inebriated and having unfettered access to everything and everyone, all the time.

"If someone could make an app that just locked me out of my phone from 11 p.m. to 2 a.m., that would be amazing, because that is literally the sole source of my anxiety," said Nicholls.

And Tiemstra echoes his concerns, adding that she doesn't even need to do anything objectively bad or questionable, but having a record of a wild night on your phone isn't exactly fun to review the day after.

"I've definitely sent a few messages that I wish I could take back, or called a few too many times people that maybe I shouldn't be calling," she said.

Cancel culture concerns

'If you're prone to hangxiety, being a little bit more mindful about how you're consuming alcohol the night prior would be pretty key,' said Mark Antczak, clinical counsellor and educator. (Anxiety Canada)

Mark Antczak is a registered clinical counsellor and clinical educator with Anxiety Canada.

An anxiety expert, he theorizes that this correlation between technology and stress is a new form of social anxiety, and he's starting to see it more with his younger clients in their 20s.

When asked if there has been a cultural shift with technology anxiety and young adults, Antczak said the two words that come to mind are "cancel culture."

"Because everything is so salient, because everything is so in each other's faces, because we have so much accessibility to what everyone thinks and says — whether it's intentional or not — it is very easy for people to form opinions and to ultimately form judgments on other individuals."

With influencer culture dominating the internet, younger generations are more aware of how they're representing themselves online than ever before. That territory also comes from being more aware of the dangers and repercussions of being online.

"If you're caught in a situation where you may have drank too much and you said something that wasn't fully thought through or something that wasn't politically correct, it could be very well taken out of context and used against you."

Staying away from the 'Sunday scaries' 

So, you went out, you had fun, and now it's the day after and you totally hate yourself. What should you do?

In an effort to beat hangxiety, most agree that you should start thinking of that before you go out.

"Obviously, the more alcohol you have, the more likely you're going to have a hangover," said addiction psychologist Kim, adding that alcohol can be enjoyed responsibly as long as people are mindful of their habits and consumption.

And while there are sometimes social pressures to drink — especially for young people — Kim says you can always practise politely saying no.

And anxiety expert Antczak agrees.

"If you're prone to hangxiety, being a little bit more mindful about how you're consuming alcohol the night prior would be pretty key," he said.

Above all, he says, even if you did do something inappropriate or embarrassing, people should give themselves permission to recognize that they're only human, and we all make mistakes sometimes.

Hangxiety has become very popular online. Also sometimes referred to as the 'Sunday scaries,' this screenshot from Dec. 21 shows that #sundayscaries has over 505 million views on TikTok. (TikTok)

For Tiemstra, she and her friends have rules before going out for a night of drinking, encouraging each other to be safe and supporting each other in not sending that mortifying text or posting that regrettable drunk selfie.

"It's such a comfort to know that if I'm going out, my friends are just still going to love me and support me the next day, even when I'm recalling all of the treacherous things that I did [the night] before."

Tiemstra says she and her friends try to laugh about embarrassing moments, while also holding each other accountable to prevent similar missteps in the future.