Gabby Petito’s Parents Want to Change the Way Domestic Violence Is Treated in the U.S.: 'Laws Are Changing' (Exclusive)

Gabby Petito family fights for new domestic violence laws and programs

It’s been nearly three years since 22-year-old Gabby Petito was killed by her fiancé Brian Laundrie, 23, while on a cross-country journey in the summer of 2021.

The disappearance and death of the budding YouTube blogger made headlines across the nation and around the globe.

Since then, Gabby’s parents, Nichole Schmidt, 45, and Joe Petito, 45, along with their spouses — Tara Petito, 43, and Jim Schmidt, 42 — have found purpose and healing by using the enormous amount of publicity generated by their daughter’s case to try to prevent similar tragedies from happening to other families. (Gabby's parents spoke on a panel at CrimeCon 2024 Nashville.)

They want to change the way domestic violence is treated in the U.S.

“We have to prevent this from happening to other people,” says Nichole. “It keeps us strong. Gabby works through us. We have to move forward and change the world together.”

Shortly after her death, the foursome created the Gabby Petito Foundation, which focuses on raising awareness about domestic violence while also creating tougher laws and policies governing how police respond to reports of intimate partner abuse and missing persons.

Related: Gabby Petito's Parents Say 'She Would Be Alive Today' If Police Handled Traffic Stop Differently (Exclusive)

“People are paying more attention to these issues, especially domestic violence,” says Nichole, a former teaching assistant who became a full-time volunteer and president of the foundation. “We get emails all the time from people saying, ‘Gabby saved my life. She gave me the power to get out of my abusive relationship.’ Survivors are coming out and telling their stories. Laws are changing and we’re going to keep fighting.”

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Adds Joe, a warehouse store chain manager who now specializes in policy and legislation for the foundation, “We couldn’t sit back and not use our voice for good."

'Domestic Violence Murders Are Preventable'

Their advocacy work is starting to pay off. Last April, the state of Florida enacted a new law — known as the Gabby Petito Act — that created a list of 12 mandatory questions law enforcement will be required to ask when responding to domestic violence calls. The list includes “Did the aggressor ever threaten to kill you or your children?” and “Does the aggressor have a gun?”

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The families contend that if the Moab City police had used this so-called “lethality assessment” when they were questioning Gabby and Brian after a traffic stop in 2021, Gabby might still be alive.

“As a mom I wanted to jump through the screen and rescue my daughter,” Nichole says, describing her reaction when viewing police bodycam footage of the incident. “I knew immediately that she was terrified, scared and in danger.”

"I think all domestic violence murders are preventable, and it all starts with communities collaborating and coming together," says Nichole, who along with Joe, filed a $50 million wrongful death lawsuit against the Moab City police. "It affects all of us. And for people to start paying attention to survivors, start believing survivors, and start changing it through education, and our youth. And Gabby's death was just like all the others. It could have been prevented. And there were many opportunities for that. And we all know that the Moab stop was one of those opportunities."

The foundation has also championed the National Domestic Violence Hotline — to which they donated $100,000 in 2022 to help build the group’s capacity — along with the Black and Missing Foundation and Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women.

The foundation also sees the need for more domestic violence prevention programs for elementary, middle and high school students.

“Prevention is key," says Tara, who volunteers as the foundation’s administrator and bookkeeper. “Kids start dating in middle school, so they need to know where they can go to get resources. They need to also know the signs. They also need to know how not to be an abuser. We would like to get into the schools and teach them to know what the signs are.”

Also in the works is a domestic violence training program for firefighters and EMS workers.

“Sometimes you're really busy, and sometimes you get a little callous and jaded sometimes,” says Jim, a fire and rescue administrator in Hillsborough County, Fla. “And you walk into a domestic violence incident. And if that victim at that moment is kind of being difficult or seems to be difficult or not really answering your questions, a lot of times it's easy to get frustrated. But it's important for them to understand why they are like that, why they're afraid to speak out. Maybe they've reached out before and they weren't getting any help, and now here you are walking in, asking questions in what may seem like a judgmental way, they're not going to open up to you. So, recognizing that you kind of have to change and pivot from your normal walking in, and being more trauma-informed and understanding. Giving them training will help them realize, 'This is why they're behaving the way they are. This is how you can connect with them.'"

Related: Gabby Petito's Family Wins $3 Million from Brian Laundrie's Estate In Wrongful Death Suit

'The Grief Comes in Waves'

For Gabby’s family the heartache of losing her continues to this day. “I don’t like the word ‘closure,'" says Joe. “You’re never going to get closure over the loss of a child. There will always be a hole in your heart that’s never going away.”

“The grief comes in waves. Some days it hits you harder,” says Tara.

Asked what they imagine their daughter would be doing today if her life hadn’t been cut short,
Tara doesn’t miss a beat. “Still taking pictures, making videos for her YouTube channel and her
blog,” she says.

“She always talked about one day living in Colorado,” Joe says, “doing some farming and continuing to inspire others.”

Nichole says that when she pictures Gabby today, she sees a woman at peace. “When I start to get sad, I hear her voice telling me, ‘Mom, I’m fine.’ That helps me come back to thinking I have to be strong,” she says . "Her death hasn't been in vain. So many lives are being changed."

She adds, “Gabby's legacy left a ripple effect on this world that will change things for generations to come for good. And I can't believe that this little blonde, blue-eyed girl can do this, but she's doing it. And we're working for her, so we'll keep going.”

If you are experiencing domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, or go to thehotline.org. All calls are toll-free and confidential. The hotline is available 24/7 in more than 170 languages.

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